The Dimensional Structure of Human Relationships

The Dimensional Structure of Human Relationships


While interpersonal relationships are conventionally treated as explicit categories, I propose a model where such categories represent combinations of latent dimensions that underlie differences in interpersonal relationships. I conduct a study to reveal these underlying dimensions, then define different types of relationships as general combinations of dimensional traits, which fade into each other. The primary hypothesis in this study was that very close friendships and romantic relationships would overlap in a latent dimension of intimacy/closeness and differ in a dimension reflecting aspects of sexual attraction. Otherwise this study was primarily exploratory without initial predictions being made. A multidimensional model as opposed to conventional definitions of relationships is produced from the results.



Methods


An online survey was conducted using PsyToolkit (Stoet 2010)(Stoet 2017) where participants were asked to answer a set of questions about up to ten interpersonal relationships they have had. The total number of participants was small (n=27), however participants submitted responses for a total of 71 relationships. 


Results


The relationship questionnaire included items reflecting characteristics about the relationship as well as their own categorization of and origin of the relationships. The questions assessing characteristics of the relationships only were principal components analysis, the scree plot suggesting extraction of 6 factors. These factors were not rotated as they were interpretable [Table 1].


Table 1

Intim = Intimacy/Closeness

Healthy = Healthy (vs toxic)

Friend = Friendzone (vs fuckzone)

Circum = Circumstantial (vs organic)

Requit = Requited (vs unrequited)

Commit = Committed (vs casual)

Intim

Healthy

Friend

Circum

Requit

Commit

I considered this person the priority of all other of my relationships

0.74

-0.15

0.32

0.06

-0.16

0.03

I was comfortable sharing explicit photos with this person

0.74

-0.16

-0.20

-0.11

0.05

0.14

I was sexually attracted to this person

0.84

-0.09

-0.48

-0.04

-0.05

-0.02

I experience feelings of affection and adoration toward this person

0.81

0.07

-0.05

0.11

-0.06

-0.19

I discussed the most private details of my life and relationships with this person

0.79

-0.03

0.34

-0.09

-0.03

0.14

The relationship was sexually exclusive (either there was a mutual decision to only have sexual activity with eachother, or to not have sexual activity with others but not necessarily with eachother either)

0.64

-0.37

-0.07

-0.12

0.21

0.32

I wanted them to be my only sexual partner

0.78

-0.17

-0.30

0.00

-0.12

0.29

I wanted me to be their only sexual partner

0.80

-0.17

-0.31

-0.02

-0.10

0.25

I wanted to continue to be close to this person for the rest of my life

0.79

0.16

0.37

0.14

0.01

0.00

They were the only person at the time that I had affectionate and adoring feelings toward and would do romantic gestures with

0.82

-0.04

-0.14

-0.03

-0.04

-0.01

I would have sexual experiences with this person

0.63

-0.28

-0.39

-0.23

0.25

-0.03

I would have ideally wanted to build a shared life with this person

0.89

0.13

0.02

0.08

-0.12

0.13

My relationship to this person was “casual”

-0.34

0.23

0.24

-0.15

-0.58

-0.15

My relationship with this person only existed due to being in a shared space (e.g., classroom, job)

-0.41

-0.22

-0.05

0.37

0.05

-0.15

My relationship with this person only existed within a shared place

-0.44

-0.06

-0.27

0.20

-0.01

-0.33

This person was in an authority position toward me

-0.33

-0.32

-0.10

0.54

0.35

-0.27

I would go out of my way to spend time with this person

0.78

-0.06

0.37

-0.04

-0.10

0.07

If they lived in a different country, I would likely visit them

0.77

0.19

0.40

0.09

-0.04

0.04

This person was my primary companion

0.75

-0.09

0.35

-0.10

0.08

0.11

This person was the only person I had sexual attraction to

0.63

-0.20

-0.32

-0.01

-0.02

0.07

I was sexually attracted to only this person but was sexually attracted to others of the opposite sex of that person

0.39

-0.37

0.00

-0.34

0.32

-0.15

I regularly had sexual activity with this person

0.57

-0.40

-0.13

-0.17

0.27

-0.02

I often talked to and did activities with this person

0.63

-0.15

0.40

0.00

0.19

-0.08

I occasionally had sexual activity with this person but not regularly

0.33

-0.32

-0.09

-0.39

0.17

-0.13

I was attracted to this person but not enough to date them

0.06

-0.18

0.27

-0.31

0.14

-0.53

There were not clearly defined rules to this relationship

-0.03

0.09

0.26

-0.14

-0.64

-0.16

This person was responsible for caring for me

0.10

-0.49

-0.05

0.52

0.23

-0.11

This person I had a relationship with wasn’t formed organically

-0.23

-0.62

-0.01

0.16

0.06

-0.06

I felt responsible for caring for the person

0.49

-0.45

0.23

-0.16

0.12

0.18

I tried to get this person to change

0.23

-0.76

0.15

0.04

0.04

-0.04

This person tried to get me to change

0.00

-0.71

0.15

0.14

0.13

0.14

I was controlling over this person

0.37

-0.44

0.17

-0.06

0.02

-0.17

This person was controlling over me

-0.17

-0.79

0.14

0.20

0.05

0.15

I was often mean to this person

0.00

-0.59

0.06

0.06

0.14

-0.46

This person was often mean to me

-0.15

-0.74

-0.04

0.24

-0.14

0.07

This person I trusted most for advice or decisions

0.53

-0.09

0.35

0.32

0.29

-0.01

I would have been uncomfortable if this person expressed sexual attraction to me

-0.74

-0.07

0.28

0.37

0.06

0.05

I tried to give the person the relationship they wanted but not what I wanted

0.16

-0.64

0.02

-0.10

-0.34

0.03

My relationship with this person was driven mainly by pity and wanting to help them

-0.10

-0.59

0.09

-0.34

-0.01

0.24

I didn’t truly feel the way I was expected to by the person

-0.28

-0.61

0.14

-0.03

-0.40

0.12

I admired this person before forming a relationship with them

0.64

-0.03

-0.03

0.10

0.03

-0.23

I’ve sometimes felt jealous or competitive with this person

0.23

-0.24

0.19

0.30

-0.27

-0.04

I felt like this person was my purpose in life

0.72

0.07

0.21

0.12

-0.11

0.08

This person was more attached and dependent on me than I wanted to

-0.12

-0.40

0.54

-0.48

0.00

0.11

This person had feelings for me that I did not reciprocate

-0.30

-0.14

0.27

-0.67

0.07

-0.10

I had feelings for this person that they did not reciprocate

0.41

-0.20

-0.30

0.10

-0.43

-0.20

I wanted this person to feel a way about me that I didn’t want to feel about them

-0.08

-0.53

0.28

0.01

0.00

-0.13

I wanted this person not feel a way about me that I felt about them

-0.05

-0.60

0.16

0.23

-0.09

0.08

I believed this person to be likeable and attractive but I didn’t want to have a sexual or romantic relationship with this person

-0.29

0.33

0.68

-0.13

-0.13

-0.26

I would never consider a sexual relationship with this person

-0.76

0.10

0.44

0.13

-0.06

-0.04

I am not particularly interested in this person romantically, but would enjoy casual sexual experiences with them

0.09

-0.12

-0.25

-0.32

0.24

-0.37

This relationship was not given an official label or category

0.05

0.06

-0.41

-0.20

-0.38

-0.36

Both of us had similar feelings about each other but one of us had these feelings much weaker

0.12

-0.49

0.18

-0.27

-0.48

-0.08

This person wanted the relationship to be more serious than I wanted it to

-0.27

-0.35

0.37

-0.47

-0.01

0.00

This person didn’t want the relationship to be as serious as I wanted

0.45

-0.07

-0.33

0.14

-0.52

0.03

This person had many other people interested in them

0.11

0.22

0.22

-0.09

-0.41

-0.22

I gave this person much more attention than they wanted to give me

0.40

-0.21

-0.03

0.17

-0.68

0.06

This person was among many people that were interested in me however I was not interest in them

-0.19

0.04

0.31

-0.61

-0.08

-0.09

This person I sought out to replace someone else

0.28

-0.32

-0.05

-0.26

-0.03

-0.37

My relationship with this person was not dependent on me liking them initially but rather due to being the only opportunity for me

-0.13

-0.53

0.02

-0.09

-0.06

-0.12

I would sometimes gossip about this person

-0.35

-0.57

-0.09

0.22

-0.18

-0.02

I considered myself loyal to this person and would take their side and help them in most situations

0.65

-0.03

0.50

0.04

-0.01

0.14

I felt the need to impress this person

0.57

-0.05

0.11

0.42

-0.04

-0.23

This person felt the need to impress me

0.24

0.00

0.43

-0.15

0.22

-0.01

I desired physical intimacy (e.g., cuddling) with this person

0.85

-0.17

-0.31

-0.07

-0.01

-0.10

I would remove other people from my life to keep this person in my life

0.52

0.19

0.32

0.30

-0.04

0.14

I found this person physically attractive

0.74

0.12

-0.36

-0.13

-0.13

-0.14

I found this person to have an attractive personality

0.71

0.41

-0.11

0.05

-0.12

-0.27

I found this person to be cool and perhaps “out of my league”

0.45

0.27

-0.23

0.18

-0.10

-0.32

I found I was “out of their league”

0.23

-0.33

-0.18

-0.23

0.02

0.33

This person was much older than me

-0.31

-0.29

0.00

0.52

0.27

-0.32

This person was much younger than me

-0.07

0.19

-0.02

-0.13

0.01

0.15

I pursued a relationship with this person despite them being in a relationship

0.23

-0.06

-0.03

0.07

0.01

-0.30

It was important for me to make a good impression with this person

0.52

0.15

0.09

0.37

-0.16

-0.19

I was more forgiving and tolerant for this person than toward others

0.58

0.00

0.29

-0.05

-0.15

-0.09

When this person did things I would normally find disgusting or annoying, I do not feel annoyed or disgusted, or even felt endeared

0.71

0.07

-0.08

0.16

-0.07

-0.15

I would never considered having a sexual relationship with this person, even if they were attractive and the type of person I would have one with

-0.77

0.10

0.52

0.16

-0.06

0.04

I trust this person enough to let them know the embarrassing and condemnable things about me and discuss personal topics with them

0.70

0.19

0.37

0.01

0.06

0.15

I felt like me and this person were unusually similar

0.37

0.13

0.40

0.26

0.31

-0.19

I felt like knowing this person was meant to happen

0.62

0.11

0.24

0.22

0.09

-0.15

I find this person to be very likeable but not much in a romantic or sexual way

-0.39

0.36

0.62

-0.01

-0.02

-0.20

I would have sexual experiences with this person but probably would not want them to be my long term romantic partner

0.05

-0.18

-0.21

-0.50

0.42

-0.31

I considered my relationship with this person to be temporary

-0.37

-0.53

-0.32

-0.14

-0.07

-0.11

I would have liked to involve this person in my personal endeavors (e.g., making art together, running a business together)

0.72

0.15

0.24

0.10

0.05

0.03

I asked this person to help me make decisions

0.53

-0.22

0.21

0.37

0.29

0.10

I never lied to this person

0.51

0.24

0.15

-0.21

0.32

0.00

I viewed this person as very good and ideal

0.77

0.29

0.07

0.04

0.06

-0.23

The way I felt about this person rapidly changed

-0.05

-0.59

0.19

0.06

-0.20

-0.31

I liked being “chased” by this person

0.56

-0.23

0.25

-0.25

-0.07

-0.18

I felt like the person would try to one up me or make me look dumb

-0.25

-0.63

0.04

0.27

-0.14

0.16

I talked badly about this person behind their back

-0.34

-0.74

0.07

0.08

-0.09

0.01


The first component had highest loadings on items reflecting fondness, attachment, loyalty, emotional/intellectual/physical/sexual intimacy, trust, and closeness and was called Intimacy/Closeness. The second component had negative loadings on items reflecting instability, conflict, control, and aspects of dissatisfaction with the relationship, and was called Healthy (vs toxic). The third component had positive loadings on items reflecting desire for intellectual intimacy and non-romantic or sexual activities, and negative loadings on items reflecting sexual and romantic attraction and intimacy, this factor was called Friendzone (vs fuckzone). The fourth component had strong loadings on items reflecting aspects of relationships that indicate the relationship was not equal or formed by mutual choice and was called Circumstantial (vs organic). The fifth factor had strong negative loadings on items reflecting diverging relationship desires and unreciprocated desires and feelings, and was called Requited (vs unrequited). The sixth factor had negative loadings on items reflecting a lack of desire for commitment or long term involvement with a person, and was called Committed (vs casual).


Correlations of the factor scores with self categorization of relationships were then calculated [Table 2]. The primary correlates defining each category are presented in table 3.


Table 2


Intimacy

Healthy-Toxic

Friendzone-

Fuckzone

Circumstantial-

Organic

Requited-Unrequited

Commit

Best friend

0.51

0.03

0.59

-0.09

0

0

Close friend

0.23

0.29

0.5

-0.2

-0.28

-0.12

Acquaintance

-0.48

0.15

-0.34

-0.26

-0.07

0.07

Crush

0.54

0.06

-0.45

0.03

-0.22

-0.26

Significant other

0.67

-0.21

-0.14

-0.14

0.26

0.24

Friends w benefits

0.11

-0.09

0.03

-0.24

-0.25

-0.39

Situationship

0.26

-0.28

-0.15

-0.15

-0.26

-0.29

Relative

-0.47

-0.24

0.05

0.5

0.28

0.05

Open relationship

0.13

-0.04

-0.1

-0.17

0.11

-0.25

Dating

0.67

-0.31

-0.12

-0.18

0.3

0.25


Table 3


Typical characteristics

Variable characteristics

Best friend

High intimacy, Friendzone

Requittedness, commitment

Close friend

Friendzone

Intimacy, requitedness, commitment

Acquaintance

Low intimacy

Friendzone-fuckzone

Crush

High intimacy, fuckzone

Requittedness

Significant other

High intimacy


Friends w benefits

Unrequited, uncommitted 

Intimacy

Situationship

Unrequited, uncommitted 

Intimacy

Relative

Low intimacy, circumstantial


Open relationship

Uncommitted

Intimacy



The primary factors correlating with the different categories of relationships were intimacy and friendzone-fuckzone, and the correlations of the categories (that are large enough to be relevant) are plotted in figure 1. A 45-degree rotation of the correlates reveals orthogonal dimensions of friendship and romance, where best friend loads highest on friendship and acquaintance lowest, and crush & significant other about equally high on romance and relatives lowest on romance. 


Figure 1


The primary factors differentiating different types of sexual relationships were the commitment and requited dimensions, and the categories with notable correlations were plotted [figure 2].


Figure 2




Discussion


The primary hypothesis was supported. It was found that best friends, significant others, and crushes were all characterized by high levels of the intimacy/closeness factor, and best friends were characterized by desire for emotional and intellectual intimacy but not sexual or romantic involvement, significant others characterized by an equal desire for emotional/intellectual intimacy and sexual/romantic involvement, and crushes by lower desire for emotional/intellectual intimacy and a high desire for sexual/romantic involvement. These findings make sense, given that a crush is typically an attraction formed from a distance before one attempts to become involved with the person, where one would be fearful of revealing themselves emotionally/intellectually in case it were to end in rejection. Couple relationships are distinctly characterized by both emotional/intellectual intimacy and sexual/romantic involvement, therefore high in closeness but not having an imbalance to one form of intimacy. Close friendships are characterized by high intimacy but generally a lack of sexual/romantic involvement but high emotional/intellectual intimacy. 


Different forms of relationships with sexual/romantic involvement were differentiated by the dimensions of commitment and requittedness. Significant others and open relationships were more required compared to friends with benefits and situationships, reflecting that couple relationships and open couple relationships tend to be more mutual and equally desired, whereas friends with benefits and situationships more often involve a discrepancy in what each person desires from the relationship. Significant others were differentiated from all other sexual relationships by the commitment dimension, which is expected given that open relationships, friends with benefits, and situationships are all characterized by a lack of commitment or being defined in terms of a couple. 


The other dimensions largely reflected aspects that were not defining of the form of relationship, but rather reflected emergent and originating aspects of a relationship, respectively the degree to which it is healthy or unhealthy, and whether the relationship was formed through mutual engagement or by chance (e.g., a relative, boss, coworker). 


Conclusion


Overall, this study provides an alternative non-categorical model for defining interpersonal relationships, which often do not fit precisely into conventional categories and can have unique blends of the characteristics defining these conventional categories. 


  1. Stoet (2010). PsyToolkit - A software package for programming psychological experiments using Linux.

  2. Stoet (2017). PsyToolkit: A novel web-based method for running online questionnaires and reaction-time experiments

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